Moron Available on: Eat Your Paisley (Restless, 1986) Sung by: Rodney Anonymous (verse) & Joe Jack Talcum (chorus) Length: 1:57

Lyrics: Hangin' out in the commode Listenin' to Depeche Mode You look like some kind of toad Why are you a moron? Got a skateboard "gnarly rad" with money from your mom and dad Take a bath 'cause you smell bad Why are you a moron? Walkin' down on old South Street Say Hello to the kids you meet If knowing you is such a treat Then why are you a moron? Got kicked out of public school Make a waste of our gene pool Face it asshole your a fool Why are you a moron? "I'm starin' at a wall doin' nothin' at all Gotta get out a' here I could use some beer Wish I could get some beer I could use some beer tonight" In and out of trendy clubs With a pair of dayglow gloves You're the only one you love Why are you a moron? Tell us you've got somethin' to say Then bore us with your anarchy We just wish you'd go away Why are you a moron? A trendy loser's what you are It's your scene and your it's czar I'd like to see you covered with tar Why are you a moron? Creeps like you should be wiped out You've got a face just like a trout's Listen to everybody shout Why are you a moron? "I'm followin' the trends 'cause I wanna have some friends. I wanna be somebody. Don't wanna be nobody, I wanna be somebody. I wanna be with someone tonight" I swear that you are Hitler's clone You spread disease wherever you roam Got the brains of a garden gnome Why are you a moron? Voted for Reagan not once but twice Think that Jerry Falwell's nice Do you keep your brains on ice? Why are you a moron? In the end you're all alone No one calls you on the phone Got no job you've got no home Why are you a moron? Hangin' out in the commode Listenin' to Depeche Mode You look like some kind of toad You're just a fuckin' moron! "I'm freezed up inside. All my brain cells have died. I'm gonna get out a' here. I'm gonna get out a' here. I'm gonna get out a' here. I'm gonna get out a' here tonight."

Tablature: Notes: South Street - Another mention of Philadelphia. South Street is also referred to indirectly in Punk Rock Girl, via Zipperhead and the Philly Pizza Company, both of which are on South St. Jerry Falwell - A minister famous for his anti-gay policies as well as his views on many other controversial topics. See Falwell.com for more info. What a wanker. Depeche Mode - Another of those "stupid European" bands of the 80's who the Milkmen were not fond of. Here they are rhymed with commode, in Instant Club Hit (You'll Dance To Anything) they are referred to as Depeche Commode. Comments: Moron is great. Just makes you wanna write some new verses. In fact, that's my next project. The Write-Your-Own-Verse-To-Moron Competition. Send 'em to me, and I'll pick a winner. You'll receive... uh, something nice. But seriously, I'm gonna work on this. Don't know if we'll come up with anything as nauseatingly funny as the Milkmen, but we can have a shot. Again, top song. I too memorized the words and love playing along, but it sometimes gets a bit too fast for me when playing along at the same time. For the Write-Your-Own-Verse-To-Moron Competition, click here. Mike Brennan: At current time, this is my favorite Milkmen song. The nutso bass, the doomy guitar, all those words, and even the drums seem louder than usual. And of course, I had to memorize them all, making this a fun one to sing with.