Instant Club Hit (You'll Dance To Anything) Available on: Bucky Fellini (Enigma, 1987)                   Instant Club Hit EP (Restless, 1987)                   Death Rides a Pale Cow - The Ultimate Collection (Restless, 1997)                   Cream Of The Crop - The Best Of The Dead Milkmen (BMG, 1998) Alternate Versions: Chaos Rules - Live At The Trocadero (Restless, 1994) Sung by: Rodney Anonymous Length: 3:35

Lyrics: You'll dance to anything (x4) Oh, baby, look at you Don't you look like Siouxsie Sioux How long'd it take to get that way What a terrible waste of energy You wear black clothes say you're poetic The sad truth is you're just pathetic Get into the groove just get out of my way I came here to drink not to get laid So why don't you just go on home 'Cause if you want to moan you'll have to moan alone You'll dance to anything (x2) Don't try to tell me that you're an intellectual Cause you're just another boring bisexual "I met Andy Warhol at a really chic party" Blow it out your hairdo 'cause you work at Hardees 80 pounds of make up on your art school skin 80 points of I.Q. located within Know what you are? You're a bunch of ... Artfags! Artfags! Artfags! Artfags! Choke on this you dance-a-teria types! You'll dance to anything by The Communards You'll dance to anything by Book of Love You'll dance to anything by The Smiths You'll dance to anything by Depeche Commode You'll dance to anything by Public Image Limited You'll dance to anything by Naked Truth You'll dance to anything by any bunch of stupid Europeans who come over here with their big hairdos intent on taking our money instead of giving your cash, where it belongs, to a decent American artist like myself! You'll dance to anything!

Tablature: Notes: Siouxsie Sioux - The lead singer/songwriter from Siouxsie and the Banshees, another bunch of "stupid Europeans". Andy Warhol - Best known as a major visual artist. The Communards, Book of Love, The Smiths, Public Image Limited, Naked Truth - Well, the song tells you really... Didn't really mind the Smiths myself, but the rest of them truly did suck. Depeche Commode - The DM pet name for Depeche Mode (another bunch of "stupid Europeans"... see above). Note that they have previously rhymed Depeche Mode with commode, in Moron from Eat Your Paisley. The words are also used in the medley that is the Chaos Rules version of Swordfish. Comments: This song reminds me (in spirit, not sound) of Mojo Nixon's cover of Girlfriend in a Coma, at the end of which he has a rant about Morrissey (The Smith's vocalist) being too damn miserable. He probably had a point. Yeah, it was funny when I first heard it. I'm over it. I promise if I ever win the lottery, I'm gonna come over there (without my big hairdo) and give my cash (where it belongs) to the Milkmen to do a couple of reunion shows. Tragic how all true genius goes unnoticed. It's not bad, but I just don't get the fuss. Basically, I think I just find it weird that the least Milkmen-like song is one of their most famous. At least it beats them being remembered for Crystalline, I guess.