Swordfish - Chaos Rules version Available on: Chaos Rules - Live At The Trocadero (Restless, 1994) Original on: Big Lizard In My Backyard (Restless, 1985) Sung by: Rodney Anonymous Length: 11:17

Lyrics: Some people believe in astrology Others believe in technology Some people believe in all those "ologies" But I believe in swordfish He believes in swordfish I believe in gravity I believe in Joanie Loves Crotchie I even believe in Melrose Place And I believe in swordfish He believes in swordfish Oh, baby, look at you Don't you look like Siouxsie Sioux How long'd it take to get that way What a terrible waste of energy You wear black clothes say you're poetic The sad truth is you're just pathetic Get into the groove or just get out of my way I came here to drink not to get laid So why don't you just a' go on home 'Cause if you want to moan you'll have to moan alone You'll dance to anything (x2) Don't try to tell me that you're an intellectual Cause you're just another boring asexual "I met Andy Warhol at a really chic party" Blow it out your hairdo 'cause you work at Hardees 80 pounds of make up on your art school skin 80 points of I.Q. located within Now that we're home We can use our secret name for these people We call them ARTFAGS! Are you all familiar with the dance? Crowd: Yeah! The famous 3 part dance? Crowd: Yeah! The first part which is called the monkey and goes like this... When I say 1,2,3, everybody do the monkey. I want even those people who showed up early for the batdance to do the monkey, all right? 1,2,3, do the monkey! Yo, yo, yo, yo. The second part of the dance is called the junkie. And the junkie goes like this... Hence the reason for clean needles. Something that lazy piece of shit George Bush does not understand. Now, when I say 1,2,3, monkey, junkie - I want you to give me a little bit of the monkey, then a little bit of the junkie. Have you got it? 1,2,3, monkey junkie! Wait! The third part and final part of my dance - is called the honky. And the honky goes like this... Dear, I think our new neighbours might be ethnic! So when I say 1,2,3, monkey, junkie, honky. I want you to give me a little bit of the monkey, a wee bit of the junkie, then I want you to give me your best Dan Quayle impersonation, and say "Dear, I think our new neighbours might be ethnic!" Everybody down Everybody down Get your asses on the ground Sit down on the ground Down there on your tush Down there on your tush Like you're sittin' on George Bush Like you're squattin' on George Bush Get down there on your tail Get down there on your tail Like you're sittin' on Dan Quayle Like you're sittin' on Dan Quayle "I can spell potato, can you?" Is everybody down? - Get your asses down Is everybody down? We should stop fuckin' round 'Cause all the cool people are down 1,2,3, monkeyjunkiehonky Dear, I think our new neighbours are ethnic! Dear, I think our new neighbours are ethnic! Joe, cut loose! Do whatever you want! We maybe doing something wrong We could be running just a little too long I guess we better end this song I say I believe in swordfish Crowd: He believes in swordfish - Hidden Track Silence - Would I be amused Would I be impressed Knowing that I had the power To put a hole into your chest? When the kids are crying After the welfare check's been spent Would I rob a liquor store To get some money for the rent? If I had a gun Would I start smoking Marlboros? Would I stop smoking Kents? Would I gain some new respect? Would I gain some confidence? Would I suddenly go crazy And shoot my family? And see myself years later On some crime show on TV If I had a gun Would I wear it in my holster? Would I keep it concealed? Would I put it on the table Every time that I'm misdealed? When I hear a nearby gunshot When I'm up at night alone Would I feel a little safer Here in my urban home? If I had a gun

Tablature: Notes: The track which is listed as Swordfish, is in fact a sort of medley. It consists of the music to Swordfish, and some of the words to Swordfish, Instant Club Hit and Rodney teaching the crowd to do the 3 part dance. Also included, as a hidden track, is If I Had A Gun, which defies the Hollywood Records ban. The hidden track begins at 8:43, after silence from 6:44. For more in depth information, try looking at the files for the original versions of Swordfish, Instant Club Hit (You'll Dance To Anything) and If I Had A Gun. Melrose Place - Trashy 90's Aaron Spelling show, particularly popular around the time that this song was recorded. George Bush - Not the evil cretin George W. Bush who we have to put up with as President these days, but his evil cretin father. Strange coincidence again: while I was writing this George W. was on TV because he choked on a pretzel. What a goon. Dan Quayle - His not-really-that-evil-but-easily-as-cretinous Vice President. "I can spell potato, can you?" - Dan Quayle is famous for not being able to spell potato properly. I think he may have spelt it "potatoe". I think much the same as George W. did recently. Comments: